As I was chopping my face up with a three blade razor this morning, I had a moment of self-criticism: am I a stupid enough consumer that I fall for marketing gimmicks like lubricating strips, patented blade protectors or ergonomic handles?

Yes. As are most men. Which is why the appearance this week of two very different articles about marketing razors struck me as funny.

On Wednesday, two smaller players in the market announced their plans for disposable four blade razors.

Analysts figure the one-upmanship had its limits � would anyone really try a five-bladed razor? � but in the blade arms race nothing is for sure.

Afshin Moghavem, president of Universal Group, said he doesn’t think four-blade razors are inherently better than three-blade ones. Yet this one is, he says, due to its moisturizing strips and thinner, fourth blade set apart from the other three.

A web outlet reports that Gillette, though, has other plans. Here’s a quote from the CEO of Gillette:

“… Sure, we could go to four blades next, like the competition. That seems like the logical thing to do. After all, three worked out pretty well, and four is the next number after three. So let’s play it safe. Let’s make a thicker aloe strip and call it the Mach3SuperTurbo. …”

“Here’s the report from Engineering. … They don’t tell me what to invent�I tell them. And I’m telling them to stick two more blades in there. I don’t care how. Make the blades so thin they’re invisible. Put some on the handle. I don’t care if they have to cram the fifth blade in perpendicular to the other four, just do it!”

You know what’s really funny? The quote above is from the Onion, but it could be real. The market for razors is so competitive, Gillette increased its advertising spending by 30% in the last quarter of 2003. There were duelling Schick and Gillette ads during the Super Bowl. Gillette’s introducing a vibrating Mach3 razor!

Even Junior, the Daytona 500 winner, will begin a marketing and PR blitz on behalf of Gillette.