When I was young, I maintained an ever fresh list of potential careers that impressed - at the time. There were some commonalities: use of large or unusual equipment; authority to halt games, traffic or adults at will; and no need to work as part of a team.
Zamboni driver
Italian or French traffic cop in a piazza
Runway model handler/stager
Fixed gear bike courier
That guy with the fluorescent wands at the airport
Tennis umpire (”quiet please!”)
Large backhoe operator
Mr. Hand, American History Teacher
Streetlight repair truck operator
The guy who indicates a successful conversion in Australian Rules Football
Escalator repairman
I now realize there are similar jobs in the professional world. Jobs that are fulfilling and rewarding - and do not interest me in the least:
Now, I know that advertorial copy doesn’t exactly attract the “A team” of writers, designers and editors, but you would think that the New York Times would catch an error this egregious: using the same stock photo clip for a fake article on “nursing excellence” and an adjoining ad for Mount Sinai Hospital.
From last week’s New York Times magazine (May 4, 2008)
Meet Hunter Somerville. While an intern at Ogilvy & Mather in Toronto last summer, he was asked to chip into a campaign by taking a shot at redesigning the back of the Shreddies box.
He now works there as a creative.
The key to winning a promotion in the advertising world?
Demonstrating a canny understanding of the product and its features. Groundbreaking insight into the market you are targeting. (And more than a dash of Machiavellian office intrigue, but let’s leave that to the senior creatives.)
Somerville’s fantastic insight? Tilt the square Shreddies by 45 degrees - thereby creating Diamond Shreddies!
“…”It came from an exercise of redesigning the back of the cereal box,” says chief creative officer Nancy Vonk. “We gave the task to a lowly summer intern Hunter Somerville. His joke idea–make the back look like the front of a new bogus product–was quickly seen as a bigger idea that could become a 360 campaign.” (Creativity-Online)
The idea was so simple, yet so fundamental, that it stopped me cold in my feet. Or cold on my sofa, waiting for American Idol to come back on.
Nothing had changed in the 67 year-old product. Nothing had to change on the production line. Yet the product was positioned as having fundamentally changed.
Even the focus groups were fooled. That’s right. As part of the marketing campaign, Ogilvy & Mather conducted focus groups to test the perceived difference between traditional “square” Shreddies and newfangled “diamond” shreddies. See for yourself. Focus group participants work themselves into identifying the improved qualities of the new product.
As the CMA blog wrote, “Poor consumer. They didn’t stand a chance.”
Today, millions of Italians are encouraging their government to perform a little act of self-love. It’s V2 day.
You have to understand, Italian politics is a giant mess. Governed by a parliament split into countless regional, ideological and personal political parties, Italy has been subjected to minority government after minority government.
Not that the ruling politicians have changed. If you bother to look up past presidents and prime ministers, you’ll see the same names popping up again and again - powerful politicians, financiers and oligarchs. Some have been cleared of conspiracy and corruption charges, others had the evidence disappear or claimed immunity as sitting legislators.
At the moment, Silvio Berlusconi is getting ready to become prime minister - for the THIRD time. There are some that argue, with some merit, that Berlusconi’s personal chokehold on print and television media in Italy plays a significant part in his abilities as a political phoenix.
Italians, understandably, are getting a little tired of their predicament. In fact, two million Italians hit the streets on September 8, 2007 to protest corruption and incompetence on the part of their government.
It was all part of a campaign of insubordination and protest organized around the “v sign” - the upturned fingers that really get the message across that an Italian would like you to vaffancuolo - perform intercourse on yourself.
Leading the charge is Beppe Grillo, a comedian, satirist and, now, political activist. Imagine Robin Williams, but with a lot more impact on the electorate. His foul but catchy anthem,
The New Yorker ran a lengthy interview with Beppe in February, which offered up an insightful examination of the political, economic and social currents that have prompted this sort of popular reaction.
Beppe has followed up on last September’s activity with V2 Day, being celebrated today, on April 25 (threw that in for you late readers on the feeds). From his blog:
…On 25 April we are liberated from nazi-fascism. 63 years later we can liberate ourselves from the fascism of information. It’s more difficult than it was then. It’s no longer rifle against rifle, hand grenade against armoured tank. The battle is between consciences that have gone to sleep and the freedom of thought, between those who no longer want to fly and those who cannot renounce the sky.
On 25 April we can change the country. We have the duty to do it for our children and for our conscience. The liberty of information cannot offer discounts. Three referenda for freedom of information in a free state: abolition of Mussolini’s Order of Journalists, elimination of a billion euro a year public financing of publishing, abolition of the Gasparri law and the duopoly Parties-Mediaset (shortly to be Mediaset-Mediaset).
In 400 Italian cities signatures will be collected. In tens of foreign cities there will be information about the control of the media in Italy. Music, bicycles, festivals and signs of peace. A new Renaissance. After so much shit, for Italy it is a duty…
I provide you with a link post. An interesting link post, but lacking original analysis nonetheless. I will have more time to be witty and incisive beginning next week.
Saturday is National Record Store Day - a development announced at SxSW that has slowed the flow of local news reporters bemoaning the closure of their favourite local vinyl peddler.
Hi It may appear that I am outrageously distracted. I have a book in my lap, a BlackBerry in my hands, and earbuds up top.
That must be why you’re staring at me.
Rest assured, I’m using my time productively, and I don’t have some form of attention deficit disorder (at least not clinically diagnosed, anyway).
The book? A galley copy of Rob Walker’s Buying In. All he asks is: are you the master of your consumer environment, or are you the bitch of marketers, pop psychologists and retail designers?
The BlackBerry? In the thirty minutes it takes to get downtown, I’ve checked my morning clippings, clicked through on a Google Alert produced by my vanity search, checked a couple of work-related blogs (Hi Kady!) and sent an email to my assistant. Oh, and I sent off a half dozen or so tweets.
The earbuds? Covers of 80s songs. Jose Feliciano. Petra Haden. Ben Gibbard. Harvey Danger. Spek. And a bunch of other stuff not so lame. It’s all better than the low rumble of diesel engines, the rattling of aging bus bodies and the snoring of middle-aged bureaucrats.
All in all, a very productive bus ride.
Don’t think I didn’t catch you sneaking a peek at your BlackBerry just as we approached downtown.
But what’s the use of that? It’s too late to actually respond to any emails, but early enough that you begin to worry prematurely about the workload that facing you at the end of that elevator ride up to your office.
Either use the BlackBerry effectively, or don’t wield it at all.
Are your ideas inspirational? Can you challenge others to believe in the impossible? Are you a social butterfly, capable of building links between cool tools and others who are crazy, funny, idealistic, iconoclastic or poetic?
Three snippets from music blogs - and all pointers to longer articles that are well worth the read.
“… I have a deep love for a very specific and short period in musical history - I don’t even think it has a name. Let’s name it right now: it’s When the Prog Rockers Got Real - Just Before They Got Plastic*.
In and right around 1980, several bands from the Progressive Rock age grew up and laid off the mushrooms. The result was a tiny period of very good rock music, where technical proficiency was still central, but the massive energies in King Crimson, Genesis, Rush, and Yes were boiled down into greatness, rather than sprawled out in pomp and crapenstance …” (Monkey X)
And this from Jeff Giles, writing at Popdose on Debbie Gibson:
“… We hear a lot about the sophomore jinx in music, and rightly so; making the jump from hit debut release to Greatest Hits, Volume 1 is a long road, and it’s got a big ol’ pothole where Album Number Two is supposed to be.
For a minute, it looked like Debbie Gibson was going to make that jump — her second album, 1989’s Electric Youth, was an even bigger hit than her debut, and since all anyone ever talked about was how Debbie wrote, produced, arranged, and played on all her songs, she seemed to have what it took to stick around for the long haul.
And then the little-known third-album jinx snuck up behind her, said “Not so fast, bitch,” and punched Debbie Gibson right in her face …”
David Caruso is Jack Lord? Robert Cass, also at Popdose, dissects David Caruso’s acting as Horatio Sanz … no Horatio Caine:
“… But while Baywatch had beefcake mannequin David Hasselhoff as its lead actor, CSI: Miami has David Caruso, whose performance makes the show endlessly watchable. (Of course, Bruce Fretts of TV Guide said in January that Caruso is “rapidly turning into the new Hasselhoff.” Please, Bruce, don’t piss all over my thesis just yet, okay?) …”
No-one would ever accuse me of being a member of the Apple chorus. I like dials, whistles and options - even if they don’t perform as promised - so I tend towards WIntel products.
But Apple knows how to drive design in support of its products. And how to keep its engineers from drowning users in details, tweaks and goddamn cascading menus.
As you design the flow of your content and its user interface, follow these guidelines to build in simplicity and ease of use:
Make it obvious how to use your content.
Avoid clutter, unused blank space, and busy backgrounds.
Minimize required user input.
Express essential information succinctly.
Provide a fingertip-sized target area for all links and controls.
Avoid unnecessary interactivity.
Other insights, which seem unintelligible to many other companies, come from a different document Design for Your Users:
“… If you’re designing an iPhone web application, it’s appropriate to go further in defining your audience and ask yourself what traits might set your users apart from all other iPhone users.
Are they business people, teenagers, or retirees? Will they use your application at the end of every day, every time they check their email, or whenever they have a few extra moments? The more accurately you define your audience, the more accurate are your decisions about the look, feel, and functionality of your user interface.
For example, if your application helps business people keep track of their billing time, your user interface should focus on making it easy to enter times and rates, without asking for a lot of details that aren’t central to the task. In addition, you might choose a subtle color palette that appears professional and is pleasant to look at several times a day …”
Sure, the Apple kingdom is a dictatorship, but Steve Jobs knows how to keep the engineers in line.
h/t to basement.org
What? Virtually anything, but mostly febreeze and scented candles.
Why? Because the 53 centimetres of snow we got on the weekend have wiped out any trace of naturally occuring scent - decaying leaves, tepid water, roadkill …
“Can Al Gore come clear my driveway?” - Facebook status update
Along with the early arrival of Daylight Savings Time, it feels like we’re turning a page into Spring.
Next up is the fundamental soul searching: just as nature breaks out anew, showering us with crocuses, buds, tiny twittering birds and a plague of rabbits, we begin to question our own existence.
The options on the table, once the last slushy puddle has evaporated:
have I fooled myself into liking this job?
have I fooled myself into believing this company has a future?
will a gradual training program really prepare me for the Terry Fox Run?
I want to frolick in the flowers. Is my significant other really a frolicker?
Is the Shamrock Shake the first step in a widening slide towards jammer shorts and oversized tshirts at the beach this summer?
why don’t I look for a nice quiet job in policy?
I think I’ll paint the shutters - after the Stanley Cup
I should shake things up - by taking an earlier bus
Wow. Interest rates are really low. Maybe I’ll jusy renew my ARM.
This is the year me and the band pile into the Prius and … Dammit, vans are carbon pigs!
Time to start training HARD CORE for ultimate!
in three months, I could be a word of mouth expert!
I will buy every album recommended by Pitchfork and Gorilla vs.Bear
Team Lohan returns!
Harold and Kumar Go To Where?
I will never leave a meeting without posing a rhetorical question
If university classmates join forces, through a Facebook group, to brainstorm solutions to questions posed by the professor, is that cheating?
That seems to be the conclusion at Ryerson University in Toronto, where an engineering undergrad faces expulsion for setting up a Facebook group for his class mates in undergrad chemistry.
The story outlined in today’s Toronto Star doesn’t exonerate the student (Did they actually share answers to online questions posed to the class? The student missed initial meetings with faculty to discuss the Facebook group, where the situation might have been diffused), but what does the university’s reaction say about how schools are adopting (or not) to the work habits of eternally wired teens?
“… The incident has sent shock waves through student ranks, says Kim Neale, 26, the student union’s advocacy co-ordinator …
“All these students are scared s—less now about using Facebook to talk about schoolwork, when actually it’s no different than any study group working together on homework in a library,” said Neale.
“That’s the worst part; it’s creating this culture of fear, where if I post a question about physics homework on my friend’s wall (a Facebook bulletin board) and ask if anyone has any ideas how to approach this – and my prof sees this, am I cheating?” said Neale, who has used Facebook study groups herself…” (Toronto Star)
Beef, tasty beef. Oh, and veal too. Did you know there’s a secret marketing organization dedicated to increasing your consumption of delectable prairie beast?
Well, not that secret. It’s the Beef and Veal Culinary Center, based in Chicago. And here’s a funny anecdote about some focus group work they conducted:
“… “This is a big country, and not everybody will have Thai curry paste,” says [Director Dave] Zino. “So we need to be careful when we’re developing consumer recipes to make sure that they’re available basically around the country.”
Even bearing that in mind, the staff will occasionally overestimate consumers’ kitchen savvy. Zino tells me about a focus group the center assembled to evaluate some of its recipes: one participant said he didn’t like the ones that called for dry red wine because he could never find it in powdered form at the grocery store …” (Chicago Reader)
Apparently, $15 million in opening weekend box office may not be enough to build buzz for Will Ferrell’s new movie, Semi-Pro. Which is a pity, since it seems like he’s been working hard - including the back alleys - to promote it.
Back alleys? Well, alternative newspapers. This funny tidbit from the San Antonio Current:
“… “I had a slew of, uh, I was a bank teller, a valet parker, um, what else? I worked at an art auction house. I was the appraisal coordinator.
I would send the appraisers out, as they would — they’d bring their appraisals of art back and I would have to type them up. But I was pretty bad at the job, because I would just leave and go on auditions. But I kept employed by being completely honest with my employers.
When they would say, you know, “That appraisal was due a month ago,” I would say, “I know, it’s — it’s terrible.” And, uh, “When do you think we can expect it?” “I have no idea.” It would almost stun them into, “OK, well, get it [done]. Right away.” “OK, I will. I’ll try my hardest. But — there’s no guarantees.” …”
Finally. A tenuous reason to link to Russell’s splendid blog, eggbaconchipsandbeans - where he provides reviews and photos of the tasty grub prepared by local snack shops across the UK.
And the far less splendid, but somewhat entralling Grocery Eats. Deep fried White Castle Slider. That’s all I’ve got to say about that.
Euan Ferguson, writing in the Guardian, takes a light hearted look at the relationship between food and the senses, building off the ideas of Filippo Tommaso Marinetti, in particular his loaded manifesto on “futurist cooking.”
[Marinetti, in a remarkable move for an Italian, suggested there were many more things better to eat than dried pasta]
Ferguson harkens back to his own memories - and the feeling of comfort brought on by otherwise boring and even unhealthy food:
“… A Ginsters sausage roll has to be accompanied by the sound of the M25, the feel of a crappy rental plastic gearstick, the gaze into rain, the smell of a cigarette to annoy the rubbish rental company and also because you cannot physically eat a Ginsters without smoking; the sound of the suburbs.
My favourite being-down meal, macaroni cheese with sweetcorn with an egg beaten into it, is best (trust me) accompanied by the feel of the remote, the opening bars of Armageddon, the smell of fresh-drying clothes, the sight of my kicked-off boots …” (Guardian Observer)
“… the most promising development at Abercrombie may be its international expansion, still in early stages. The company’s Canadian stores are hugely popular, generating three times the revenue and profits of the average U.S. counterparts …”(Barron’s)
“… it’s a bit like making sausages. You don’t want to see them made, but they sure taste good …”
I love charcuterie. Of all shapes and sizes. Of all flavours, from savoury to hot. Fatty to dry.
Problem is, really good charcuterie demands careful preparation, respect for the process, and skill honed over time. And paying trough the nose.
“… His meats earn above their weight class, too. Eve’s $16 charcuterie plate, which features 12 to 15 of [Dan] Fisher’s sausages and terrines, brings in $32,000 a month, Fisher says. Nowadays it seems like charcuterie is on every menu in town whether or not it’s made in-house …” (Washington City Paper)
Still, you have to admire an industry where a specialist like Salumi Artisan Cured Meats can plainly state that some products - even commonly available ones like pancetta - aren’t available. And others won’t be ready until the spring.
Forget beta testers in Russia, India and Iowa. Forget launching a 0.6.3 version with only 10,000 users. Here’s an excerpt from a 1981 market research report on the first version of the arcade classic Centipede:
“… Although test results from these locations should still be valid, the CENTIPEDE games tested at the Mountain View Time Zone, the Cloverleaf Bowl, the Albany Bowl and the Ice Cream Dock are not identical to the production version of CENTIPEDE …” (Atari documents, pg. 26)
What names! You can imagine each of those locations, down to the placement of the snack bar and the stoners hanging out in the back. Here’s some more insight from Atari Marketing Management:
“CLOVERLEAF BOWL: This location does not seem to have a large base of highly skilled players. The clientele is similar to a typical street location in terms of the level of game play. The average age of players seems to be 9 to 16, with a fairly high ratio of female players.
For the first 2-1/2 weeks CENTIPEDE was placed near the bowling lanes. The game was then moved near the front entrance of the bowling center and seemed to pick up slightly in earnings …” (pg. 29)
In case you’re wondering, the game made between $210 and $260 a week.
“… ICE CREAM DOCK: During the fourth week [of the beta test] the ASTEROIDS CT game was robbed, which resulted in an artificially high percentage of gross figures for the other three games…” (pg. 31)
Here’s some statistics on the Mountain View Time Zone:
“… There are a total of approximately 87 games … with a mix of about 75% video and arcade pieces, and 25% flipper games. Berzerk, Gorf, Pac-man and Rally-X are the newest videos in the location…”(pg. 37)
This from the “lessons always repeated, never learned file”:
“…The most frequently mentioned negative attribute of CENTIPEDE was the trak ball… [34% did not like it]” (pg. 39)
And, finally, an observation from focus group tests:
“…The older group discussed cabinet styles [between the “upright” and the “cocktail”]. A strong preference was stated for the standard upright cabinets over the shorter versions because it gives them a feeling of control and allows “body english.”
You just KNOW that their “body english” was accented by tight jeans, headbands and maybe even mullets.
Will Smith’s Top 10 Red Carpet Poses - and they’re all him pointing. (Celebslam)
The renegade art of (unauthorized) rock biography (The Phoenix)
Burlington’s The Radiator - a low power station in Vermont. Which is funny, because radiators are loud, often distracting and frequently unreliable (Seven Days Vermont)
It’s 1985, and we’ve got a white breakdancing crew in unitards from Ottawa, old-school newsticker chyron, and CJOH’s Max Keeping. Oh, and when’s the last time you saw a clip from Flashdance in a news broadcast?
Perhaps you were so inspired by Valentine’s Day that you spent hours sifting through thousands of songs to compile the perfect mixtape (or playlist, for you young kids). Or maybe you just slapped something together.
Either way, you’re probably still in high school or college.
But what were the chances you actually “scored” last night? Well, it all has to do with the Vicki Mendoza diagonal, illustrated above.
At the end of the night, did your soundtrack of love inspire sensual behaviour, or a frenetic and often confusing jumble of emotions?
THAT’s the product of the Mendoza diagonal. In an episode of How I Met Your Mother this season, Barney explained how your potential mate had to balance off their crazyness with a suitable level of hotness - much like the artists you picked for that mixtape.
Why the hell would you do that? A natural response to any one of the songs singled out by I am Fuel, You Are Friends in a post called That’s Dangerous! :: the mix. There are 22 songs, including:
touch me, I’m sick, by Mudhoney
wondering where the lions are, a cover of the Bruce Cockburn song
And … as much as I hate to do it … the new music superblog, PopDose, is cornfed white. Abba and Mambo #5 featured in the same week?
But seriously, PopDose is a fantastic blog, drawing from the talents of Jefito, Jeff Vrabel, Jason Hare, Py Korry and many others. But it’s still Wonder Bread spread with Cheez Whiz and the crusts cut off.
Are you the type that likes listening to long form documentaries or character vignettes on public radio - but really get tired of sitting in your car in the driveway as they finish up?
I’ll admit something - I do not have a radio in my house. At least not one uncovered by dust and not hidden by old Christmas ornaments.
Which is why Speechification is so valuable to me - it’s a way to stumble across good radio programs without going for milk or motor oil.
Speechification is a not very orderly or predictable series of jot notes to interviews, broadcasts, documentaries and splashes of audio - on a wide variety of subjects. Exactly the sort of field guide to online archives you would expect from the varied tastes of Dan Hill, Russell Davies, Steve Bowbrick, Bobbie Johnson and Roo Reynolds.
Portland blogger discusses how to be the best faux sports journalist around. Tip #1? Don’t drink in the press box. No-one tell Jim Carr or Harry Doyle.
Young journalist complains about getting up at … wait for it … 6 am. (SPJ blogs)
“…It wasn’t the official Disney campsite, but one of those bargain ones owned by a chain-smoking, retired forklift operator who kept his horny dog tied to a post by the check-in window. To my sisters and me, though, it was the Taj Mahal of trailer parks. We’d lie awake under the moon in a three-way spoon, counting stars and listening to the uncharacteristically subdued murmurings of our parents. It’s one of the few snapshots of immeasurable happiness from my past.
Today, millions of Italians are encouraging their government to perform a little act of self-love. It’s V2 day.
Finally. A tenuous reason to link to Russell’s splendid blog, 
I once had an employee who hated my habit of picking up a red pen immediately after being given a document to review.