Crispy Mint Indiana Jones M&Ms

They suck.

It was to be expected.With the new Indiana Jones movie due to come out on June 22, the cross-branded products are beginning to emerge.

Already in the market for a M&Ms from the candy machine here at the sports complex, I came across a bag of M&Ms with old-school Indiana Jones on the package.

What are the brand attributes commonly associated with Indy?

  • gruff
  • gritty
  • confrontational
  • quick to the mark
  • witty

Seeing Indy on the packaging, I honestly expected the candy to have some variety of nut - maybe a brazil nut, a little darker and more flavourful than the run-of-the-mill peanut? Maybe even a praline.

Wrong.

Crispy Mint Indiana Jones M&Ms, seems to have no association with Indy. The candy embodies these attributes:

  • light, in taste and in heft
  • minty
  • a wisp of a crunch
  • a selection of pastel green shells
  • a slight aftertaste

This is not Indiana Jones’ candy.

If I could imagine any Indiana Jones character eating this stuff, it would be:

  • the Gestapo agent from Indy I
  • the French Archeologist
  • the double crossing German archeologist
  • the advisor to the teenage Indian Rajah
  • Kate Capshaw

In fact, I half suspect that Mars is just tricking us into buying old Shrek merchandise.

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