Rock legend, that’s what it draws upon. Comedy gold, that’s its potential. The Kiss Coffeehouse is now open in Myrtle Beach, people! Promoting the unlikely combination of lifestyle beverages and debauched personal lifestyle would be a dream assignment for any agency type. Your creative juices should flow freely when drawing up these marketing materials. The inspiration is evident from the menu, beginning with the Frozen Roccucino and ending with the “assorted cakes, pies and sweets (as priced)”.

Even for a relatively uninspired public relations flack, this is an opportunity for puns, thinly veiled insider jokes and loaded quotes. Unless, of course, you resort to the dreaded exclamation mark. One is acceptable. One exclamation mark plays the same sort of role as Rod Roddy did on The Price is Right: reminding you that being excited and sweaty is preferable to stone bored and still. Two exclamation marks? Your event better involve large cash prizes or superstar wrestlers. Three? Now you’re in Ron Popeil and Mike Levey territory.

“According to Paul Stanley, “The KISS Coffeehouse is our way of providing everyone with the buzz of great, quality treats and coffee filled with enough sugar and caffeine to get the party started, and keep it going!”

Gene Simmons adds, “Every army needs food and drink and the KISS Army is no exception! Even the non-enlisted will find our treats and java rockin’ good!” (news release)

Want more information? Turn to a member of the Kiss Army for a first-person account of the store opening!