Canuckflack

“More at eleven” - now this is a tshirt I can get into. From threadless.

Rock legend, that’s what it draws upon. Comedy gold, that’s its potential. The Kiss Coffeehouse is now open in Myrtle Beach, people! Promoting the unlikely combination of lifestyle beverages and debauched personal lifestyle would be a dream assignment for any agency type. Your creative juices should flow freely when drawing up these marketing materials. The inspiration is evident from the menu, beginning with the Frozen Roccucino and ending with the “assorted cakes, pies and sweets (as priced)”.

Even for a relatively uninspired public relations flack, this is an opportunity for puns, thinly veiled insider jokes and loaded quotes. Unless, of course, you resort to the dreaded exclamation mark. One is acceptable. One exclamation mark plays the same sort of role as Rod Roddy did on The Price is Right: reminding you that being excited and sweaty is preferable to stone bored and still. Two exclamation marks? Your event better involve large cash prizes or superstar wrestlers. Three? Now you’re in Ron Popeil and Mike Levey territory.

“According to Paul Stanley, “The KISS Coffeehouse is our way of providing everyone with the buzz of great, quality treats and coffee filled with enough sugar and caffeine to get the party started, and keep it going!”

Gene Simmons adds, “Every army needs food and drink and the KISS Army is no exception! Even the non-enlisted will find our treats and java rockin’ good!” (news release)

Want more information? Turn to a member of the Kiss Army for a first-person account of the store opening!

As agencies and consultants rush to establish their online bona fides and publicize their new social media practices, some cautionary words about the behaviour that undermined previous management fads - and the consultancies that tried to capitalize upon them. A study of the 1990s hype behind TQM reveals that inexperienced and bombastic consultants drove experimentation and implementation in the field, but eventually abandoned the specialty, to be replaced by the technical and management experts that had originally championed the idea.

Fifteen years ago, these management fad “fashion surfers” wore power suits, sometimes had a preference for tasselled loafers, carried a Filofax and had never heard of flavoured vodka. They can’t be as easily identified nowadays. Maybe t-shirts from Threadless under the Banana Republic shirts? Suits from H&M? Two MacBooks (white and black) in their carry-on?

What’s certain is that a basic knowledge of design, information management and CSS has never before been leveraged as quickly and as widely. And with as much targeted online promotional copy. In 1995, the competence of your team was demonstrated by the sales of your business book. Today, by the size of your download. (A hint: the more pictures and graphs, the better)

Coverage today in the WSJ, but more details are available from the Academy of Management news release.

” … As a new management approach gains in popularity, large numbers of generalist consultants, expert at recognizing burgeoning opportunities, jump in to advise firms on implementing the new method, even though these generalists may have little knowledge of its intricacies.

This influx of “fashion surfers,” as one scholar called them, produces many program failures, and the practice that not long before was widely viewed as a virtual panacea gets a bad name. This in turn results in diminished demand, and consultation about the practice becomes mainly the province of experts and specialists, much as it was before the boom set in.

In the words of the study’s authors, Robert J. David of McGill University and David Strang of Cornell University, “These supply-side dynamics…help explain why fashion booms are so fragile.” They also “suggest that fashionable practices can return to their technical roots once the hype is over.” (AOM news release)

There’s the rub for actual bloggers, podcasters and online innovators: if you continue to build expertise in the field, your practice will likely survive.

Original pointer from Business Innovation Insider.

Technorati: hype fad

The screencap of the new For Immediate Release store in Second Life prompted a thought: is there a new business opportunity for retail design and experiential consultants in this new environment? Is there a “butt-brush” factor in the American Apparel store? How exactly can you differentiate between fine North American t-shirts and the lesser quality Vietnamese knock-offs? Is there a future for pashmina in such dynamic online markets?

How exactly will customer service evolve in this sort of environment? Will it parallel the in-person experience (with the real possibility that a disgruntled employee could just go “postal” without RT effects), or will online staff slouch like a real-life American teenager but sound like a 34 year-old engineer from South Asia?

Neville’s got more details on last week’s Second Life marketing meetup (man, that term sounds SO 2002), Mitch has a podcast/Skype conversation recorded on the periphery of the meeting, and the transcript is on Brands in Games, a blog looking at games-based advertising.

While there is a detailed examination of the phenomenon of virtual world marketing in Harvard Business Review, I can just sense the possibilty for buzz marketing, left unfettered to ferment in an environment where most participants already cloak their identity, to go horribly wrong and possibly damage brands.

Now THAT’S targeted online advertising! YouTube serves up an ad for monster.ca when you call up a video of Stevie Wonder playing the theme song on Sesame Street.

In the absence of new content, may I point you to the Financial Time’s continuing coverage of Martin Sorrell’s speech earlier this week, which includes this choice quote from a reputable correspondent:

Hat tip to Constantin!

Martin Sorrell has a few words for you, no matter what profession you work in. Develop web apps that undermine the existing media infrastructure? You may very well be a socialistic anarchist (not that there’s anything wrong with that!). This nugget emerged during a speech to the Newspaper Society earlier this week.

Work in an advertising agency? Work with an advertising agency? Hired an advertising agency? He’s got some words for you as well (video from AdAge) To be honest, this videotaped speech was supposedly written around a random collection of slides provided to Sorrell (at a WPP-organized event during Cannes).

Sorrell’s Newspaper Society speech, from the limited published accounts, also touched upon motivating young creative-types and chastised print media for giving their content away for free. More analysis of the Society speech from Open and Media Influencer.

Brand Republic, however, seems to have singled out the single biggest threat to Sorrell’s agglomeration of media companies:

“He also referred to the threat of global online giants such as Google, which he said seem set on setting up their own electronic media planning and buying exchange, to effectively erode the importance of agencies in the media planning and buying transaction.”

Dammit! Those socialistic anarchists are going to suck out our easy media buying fees!

(In comparing Sorrell to Cuban, I just mean contrarian and iconoclastic, since Sorrell clearly isn’t as strong a web evangelist. They both, however, share an interest in making serious cash off new media)

JoCoPro - the online effort to create videos for Jonathan Coulton’s quirky songs using images from Flickr. The newest is for Ikea - my favourite multinational design-driven retail-oriented commercial panegyric. (wmv, mp4)

Despite Flickr’s online buzz and general ease of use, it still has less than an eighth of the market share of Photobucket, the largest online photo host. As LeeAnn Prescott at Hitwise points out,

“Photobucket, Slide, and Imageshack are all image hosting sites, and MySpace is their primary source of traffic. In fact, MySpace was responsible for 76% of Slide’s traffic in May 2006, 56% of Photobucket’s traffic, and 50% of Imageshack’s traffic.”

Paul Kedrosky makes a more blunt assessment of these numbers:

“Photobucket’s first place position is just another example of how backending other services — especially doing it without waiting for permission — is where the real leverage is online.”

In case you’re looking for more ironic musical amusement, here’s Baby’s Got Back, folk style on Google Video, as performed by Jonathan Coulton. (Here’s the Sir Mix-A-Lot original)

PR Week US has jumped on the podcasting bandwagon with some fine offerings, including Elly Trickett’s one-on-one interviews with senior marketing and PR types at P&G, Sunkist and Aflac, as well as a Q&A session with editor Julia Hood.

The recording quality varies from podcast to podcast, but I’m sure that will improve as this important trade pub gets its sea legs working with the medium.

Last week, I compared the unnumberable threads of social media theory and criticism to the sects found in the movie Life of Brian. This week, word from the NYT that pro-pigeon activist groups in London are fragmenting among similar lines:

“”The real fight is among themselves,” the [London] official continued, comparing the apparent discord within the pigeon group to the picayune disagreements between the Judean People’s Front, the People’s Front of Judea, and the Judean Popular People’s Front in the film “Monty Python’s Life of Brian.”

Members of the pigeon group, Save the Trafalgar Square Pigeons, disagree. For starters, they say, the rogue feeders, who sometimes call themselves the Pigeon Action Group, are not part of their operation, but independent operators recklessly taking matters into their own hands.” (New York Times)

The cause of the pigeon brouhaha? “Red Ken” Livingstone, the Mayor of London, is determined to drastically cut the number of pigeons living in Trafalgar Square.

Oooooh. A Max Cannon cartoon strip auto-generator! (You have to click on the image - it’s worth it!)

A Canadian success story from the latest Association of Alternative Newsweeklies awards - and a touch of homegrown porn.

The Coast, a Halifax weekly, (yay Canada!) took “both first and second place in Editorial Layout, as well as first place in the Illustration and Web site categories (small circulation division). The Coast also earned an Honorable Mention for its Special Section entry.”

I’m a BIG fan of the “holiday planner” cover that won the illustration award. (The second place winner, “confessions of a substitute teacher,” would have been my class. In fact, that’s almost a Mattel Football game the kid is playing in the back row of the illustration.)

Also out this week were judgements on applications for membership in the association. In past years, the comments from the review committee have been scathing at times. This year things were more relaxed.

Yes! Weekly of Greensboro was turned down for association membership due to a number of editorial criticisms and perceived conflicts on the part of management, but this comment from the review committee caught my eye:

“The hometown porn-star story certainly caught everyone’s attention. But it “didn’t have much information at all and even though the adult film star offered to take off her outer clothes … all we see is her in a long-sleeved shirt and jeans. That doesn’t seem very edgy. Have more fun!”

Well, as someone’s mama once said, why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?

That story is amusing, if only for the insight it offers into the reporter’s active fantasy life:

” … She calls herself RayVeness these days and makes California her home, but this woman grew up just across the city limits in Jamestown before leaving at age 18 to become arguably the biggest adult film actress this area has ever produced. (been doing research, have we?)

She’s pretty in a way one wouldn’t instinctually attribute to an adult film star, with crystalline blue eyes set off nicely by her dark tresses and creamy skin. Her body is voluptuously trim, like a young mother with a strict Pilates regimen. And she’s reserved, thoughtful and wise like any 33-year-old career woman would be after a life of hard-won victories, some unfortunate setbacks and a maybe a few regrets.

Someone’s been mainlining Knots Landing and Desparate Housewives!

There’s a new player in podcasting in Ottawa - Podcast Producer. As the name belies, this group of experienced TV, radio and communications pros seek to sell podcasting as a technology and a communications tactic. I say sell because their website has very little of the Web 2.0 evangelizing we’ve come to expect from new media companies. In fact, the entire site has a very 1999 feel to it.

Unfortunately, the total site seems like a very poor marketing effort. Most new media sites nowadays have incorporated “white papers” written in-house to demonstrate their understanding of the theory as well as the practice of new media technology. While patently written to pitch their own products and services, these “white papers” do demonstrate that your professed “experts” have done a little thinking about the validity of the technology and the future direction of the industry.

Nothing like that on Podcast Producer.

Even more stunning is the lack of an actual podcast on their site. I cannot understand why anyone would contemplate hiring them as podcasting experts if they haven’t found the time to create one, two or three short marketing podcasts to pitch their wares. Instead, we get the promise that “We have several new podcasts in development that will be premiering over the next two months.” The reaction might as well be: “well, call me when you’ve got it figured out, guys.”

And the blog … Not a sign of original thought after the first introductory post. Every post is a straight cut and paste from a paperware article, with link of course.

Did I mention the website has an address, a phone number and contact form, but no email address? If you’re trying to pitch an online service, shouldn’t you be willing to welcome initial contact by email?

I’ve seen (and heard) the work done by some of the principals in their original professions, and they can likely produce a high quality podcast. As it stands, however, their website appears like they’re just jumping on the Web 2.0 bandwagon - and doing a poor job of it.

It’s mainline old-school marketing for a radical new technology.

A number of Canadian public relations and marketing agencies are investing heavily in the range of social media technologies - not just podcasting - and are working hard to integrate this work into their traditional campaigns. Podcast Producer’s going to have to try harder to develop their own niche in the game - or simply become sub-contractors to their integrated marketing efforts.

Technorati: canadian podcasting

Have you ever wondered what it would feel like to be intellectually bitchslapped by a business consultant? Strategy + business now offers the opportunity, laying out in detail how drastically the marketing profession has to change in order to adapt to new media models and technologies.

“… The typical business marketing career has attracted gregarious people who operate comfortably within a familiar professional culture with well-defined techniques. But now marketers must not just select and purchase proven instruments. They must envisage, shape, and develop new tools for designing and engendering more effective consumer connections. This demands openness to experimentation, an inclination toward pioneering, and an ability to integrate marketing with strategy as never before. The new marketing team must do this while honing the number-crunching analytical ability that is needed to justify and fine-tune new strategies.

… The shape of the future of marketing is too novel and too important to be left to traditional marketers. Just as P&G pioneered brand management for the 20th century, now is the time for marketers to reinvent their role — and to shuffle the marketing team to do it.” (strategy+business)

And it goes on and on. Well worth the read.

I’ve said it before: the Guardian’s Fiver is worth its subscription price. All the footie talk you can handle, with witticisms and striking social commentary to boot! Like this letter to the Fiver:

“”Hoff-adulation, Right Said Fred, leather shorts, neo-fascism, wurst-worship, moustaches and busty beer-wenches in translucent gypsy tunics: such staples of German life prove definitively that our teutonic brethren are some distance ahead of us Brits on the Po-Mo irony curve. Stop the mockery, we have much to learn” - Ed Wilson.

I’m sure you’ve seen this: David Hasselhoff performing Hooked on a feelin’.

On Nieman, a pair of articles penned by Brad DeLong and Susan Rasky:

Twelve Things Economists Need to Remember to Be Helpful Journalistic Sources

“7. Remember that the plural of anecdote is data. Help journalists understand how to find and use anecdotes that are representative of genuine trends.

Twelve Things Journalists Need to Remember to Be Good Economic Reporters

“10. It’s all just transactions. Your calling as a journalist is to give the public the tools to evaluate government policies and actions. Government is not a glamorous gathering of celebrities. Government is not a sports cage match. Journalism is not a gossip circle. Report on government as you would report to your siblings on the rental agent your mother hired to handle her Florida condo.”

Sometimes it’s easy to be blinded by the glimmer of technology, overlooking in the process the larger socio-economic trends truly changing your environment. I suspect that’s the case with the ongoing blog beatdowns prompted by the unholy marriage of social media and marketers (not to mention those infernal public relations types).

Which is why I welcome this dose of reality from a fellow Ottawa blogger, Brendan Hodgson:

“… a blog is really nothing more than an easy-to-use content management system that allows anyone to publish, well, whatever they want onto the web. It is, as Dave mentions, “just a tool.”

However, the real impact is the effectiveness by which a company uses that tool and, more importantly, how that usage is perceived and received by the target audience.”

” … That said, let’s encourage experimentation… because the rules have yet to be written.”

As part of the cabal of public relations, marketing and advertising folks working to understand and integrate social media in our everyday activities, I sometimes (okay, often) get the feeling that many “pur laine” bloggers want the online environment to evolve on their terms and hew to their principles.

I buy into those principles: I’ve been trying to follow them for almost three years now. That doesn’t mean, however, that the tools, the shiny mechanisms, of social media cannot be adapted for commercial purposes. The world IS changing, but opposing forces usually achieve an equilibrium. (Unless the Cluetrain won out. That would be amazing, wouldn’t it? Talk about a Fabian world)

Reading through the endless debate about what social media tactics are acceptable and which are damnable, I’m often reminded of the intractable yet amusing battle that rages between sects in the movie Life of Brian . Despite a common enemy and a shared history, the Judean People’s Front, the People’s Front of Judea and People’s Popular Front of Judea spend most of their energy cussing each other out.

FRANCIS: Well, blessed is just about everyone with a vested interest in the status quo, as far as I can tell, Reg.

REG: Yeah. Well, what Jesus blatantly fails to appreciate is that it’s the meek who are the problem.

Anthony Lilley, writing in the Guardian, with some cruise-related interpretation of the catchphrases of social media:

“… At the other extreme, every night at 10.30pm there was a show. Now that’s what you call content. Not “generated” by “users”, but rather shared by professional people with special skills at telling jokes, changing with dizzying rapidity between skimpy, sparkling costumes and singing songs by Nat King Cole. The comedian even incorporated content about the users sitting near the stage in his act. At the end of each show, a nice man called Warren came on and gave us vital information such as when we could have our breakfast tomorrow. He was like a BBC newsreader with the remit to educate 1,700 passengers. But with more sequins.

“… And in the bar, there’s was some truly hardcore UGC - karaoke. Thank you to Lydia from Surrey for her un-ironic rendering of You’re So Vain by Carly Simon. …”

Spot the interesting agenda item in the Businessweek mini-profile on Google’s Marissa Mayer? This sort of piece is traditionally regarded as lightweight filler material, a “look how hard I work” profile. How many mainline corporate communications shops would highlight a major corporate PR concern in this sort of forum?

Admit it - you’d probably substitute “Senior Strategy Meeting” for “Executive Strategy Meeting on Google China.”

Unless this is all part of a cunning plan to demonstrate continuing corporate concern for the issue without actually doing anything about it.

While indie bands may seem like they’re benefiting from a bump in internet buzz, some industry reps are arguing that even the smallest of labels and bands have to rely upon sophisticated marketing plans if they plan to surf the wave of poseur adoration to continuing success. The danger lies in burning out too quickly, without having built a reliable fan base.

This isn’t news to public relations flacks. Each of our projects demands that that we map out the intended effects and plan for unanticipated consequences. That’s probably why my clients think I’m either paranoid, cynical or untrusting.

” … “Everyday mainstream media is sourcing stuff off the Internet and putting it into a different perspective because their footprint is so large,” says Mark Ghuneim, CEO of New York-based digital marketing agency Wiredset. “The Independent in the UK will do a story on blog buzz about a band like the Arctic Monkeys, and then the next day Fox News here is putting it on the 10 p.m. broadcast saying it’s the next Beatles. That doesn’t do anybody any favours. Once you get into mass media news cycles and those types of trends it’s like walking into the undertow. You have no type of control.”

… “In an attention economy early attention is important. Then less is more. You need to go back to focussing on performing and making sure people have access to the music. I don’t know that a band that just started needs to be on ‘Saturday Night Live.’” (Billboard, via LHB, via the Scotsman)

Except maybe Lindsay Lohan, who has no intention of building album sales through any other mechanism. TRL and SNL are enough for her!

“Off the reservation.” An antiquated and some would say offensive analogy, but effective in describing a spokesperson who strays from your agreed and approved position. Or maybe the result of a comment that seems a little too jocular and wry perhaps.

How do you keep your spokesperson from freelancing? In a world that values transparency, how do you avoid limiting your outward communications to three key messages or one trite (and likely self-evident and self-serving) “official comment”?

By managing your relationships with the media effectively. By developing a familiar rapport with each reporter, by managing their expectations for how much information or analysis you can provide, and by avoiding dumbass asides at the end of your interview.

Like this one: “Canada’s a slam dunk,” Mr. [John] Rarrick said. “You guys got winter 10 months out of the year.” (Ottawa Citizen)

That’s how a spokesperson for Soup Kitchen (the franchise hawking soups popularized by Seinfeld’s Soup Nazi) characterized prospects for the operation north of the border.

This despite the fact that their first Canadian franchise, set up in Ottawa last December, just closed. Another has just opened in Toronto - well known for its relatively temperate winters.

I know I sound slightly defensive, but what sort of message does this send to investors?

“My company sells a weather-sensitive premium product, but I know little about the climate of one of our professed growth markets.”

“I’m your bud and I think, over the course of these last eight minutes, we’ve made a bond. We’ve gotten close enough for me to make jokes about your country.”

When I read a quote like that, I wonder what other juicier comments (or slurs) the reporter left in his/her notebook.

Oh - and it was a balmy 40f last night, I will admit.

Steve says that online media spend doesn’t equal (or approach) online usage rates, and that means “the web is the Rodney Dangerfield of media.” I guess our electronic mistress don’t get no respect. Accompanying his post is a picture from Rodney’s stand-up days, the Rodney that jokes about his work pressures, his horrible friends and his traumatic home life: “my wife likes to talk to me during sex. She just called me from Vegas!”

I think he’s targeted the wrong Rodney. The Rodney advertisers are afraid of is Al Czervik, the fast-talking, back-slapping developer from Caddyshack.

I have one word for you, kids. Personalization. It’s the only thing that’s keeping you from having to compete tooth and nail for work with a far better educated young man or woman with a stronger grasp on grammar who just happens to live in India, Kenya, South Africa or Tasmania.

” In fact, outsourcing is so easy that I had this speech today written by a young man named Panjeeb from Bangalore. If you don’t like the jokes, I assure you they were much funnier in Urdu.” (Stephen Colbert, speaking to a Knox College commencement)

So put some effort into your work, instead of phoning it in. it’s not the size of the media list, it’s how you use it. Your media list may be lengthy, but does it eventually get to the point? Does your pitch, your newsletter article, your speech actually relate in a meaningful way to your intended audience?

If the answer’s no, I hear there are great opportunities in the food service sector.

To the new interns:

Welcome! I assume by now you’ve met Trish, our administrative assistant. (She’s married. Forget about it. This isn’t Wedding Crashers) She will be able to help you settle into your new space (behind the coat rack) and find the supplies you will need for a productive term (making copies of your ass and phoning your friends in Europe) here at the agency.

We’re really excited to have a new crew of energetic public relations grads (whose spirit hasn’t yet been crushed by the blunt reality of the real world) with us, ready to leap at any challenge (like wearing a mascot costume on a 95 degree day, little kids kicking at your shins). We’ve made an effort to pull together a group of talented and outgoing young professionals (Is it the Hamptons or a quick flight up to the Cape this weekend?), and we think the agency will benefit from your insight and fresh thinking.

After reviewing the workload facing our more experienced account executives (like finding a new job after the merger), I think we’ve lined up a full slate of interesting (Get me a bagel and a coffee, will ya?) and rewarding projects (Here’s 500 brand stickers. Hit the bricks, and don’t come back until you’re busted by the Port Authority for vandalism) for you to tackle over the next eight to twelve weeks.

Over your term, there will likely be opportunities to take part in new business pitches (the Practice Leader needs you to drive him to the airport - tomorrow morning at 3), client account reviews, focus groups, presentations, and maybe even some travel!

The agency is in the process of developing a PR 2.0 practice, and I’m sure that some of you will want to share your experiences growing up (Want to buy some Second Life jewellery?)and living in an interconnected world (where Yo la Tengo and Ted Leo are considered mainstream and popular).

Just remember: the agency’s success depends upon your ability to bring it. Expertise. Insight. Confidence. Creativity. It must be brung, and brung well.

Trish will be providing you with our standard welcome package, which includes helpful guides on the office’s standard software, suggestions on appropriate office wear (it’s the motion of the ocean that counts), and the agency’s code of ethics and acceptable business behaviour (sex in the office is NOT okay. save it for after work. at my place on the beach).

Oh. If, god forbid, you do have any problems with your pay or benefits (what benefits? you mean the sesame street band aids?), make sure to get in touch with Trish.

Thank you for choosing our agency, and don’t hesitate to contact me (Do you really think I care? As Chris Rock says, minimum wage means I’d pay you less, but it’s against the law) if you have any concerns over the course of your internship.

Eric ‘Otter’ Stratton

(Sorry if you got multiple versions of this in the feed. I tried a neat little floating span trick - that apparently breaks IE)

To follow up on yesterday’s post, John Wagner asked why I hadn’t grossly mischaracterized 40-something agency types. This one’s for you, John!