That’s it. I’ve given up on Outlook. The notes and calendar functions on the Blackberry are too tiny. I’m moving back to analog or, as we used to call it in the 80s - pen and paper.
I’ve picked up some index cards, a Moleskine and a nice weighty rubber band (like the one on McSweeney’s 7, for you literati out there) and I’m going to write notes. Brief notes. I’m not going to write down everything said during that 2 hour planning meeting, but I will write enough to prompt my memory. No more blank stares when you bring up sub-point 5, the one the AVP considered “a line in the sand”!
Nope. With my new cards and notebook, I’ll be just as engaged as I was in grad school … but probably less caffeinated.
I’ve been doing my googling, and I’ve noticed all the GTD addicts out there. I’m not “installing” a Hipster PDA. I really like the “hacks” for the Hipster PDA, but that is just too organized and OCD a system for me.
My take on index cards? You can spend all your time fretting over the quality of your indexing system, or you can just grab the information and run. Like in Glengarry Glen Ross:
Blake: Go and do likewise, gents. The money’s out there, you pick it up, it’s yours. You don’t–I have no sympathy for you. You wanna go out on those sits tonight and close, close, it’s yours. If not, you’re going to be shining my shoes.
Bunch of losers sitting around in a bar. (in a mocking weak voice) “Oh yeah, I used to be a salesman, it’s a tough racket.” (he takes out large stack of red index cards tied together with string from his briefcase)
These are the new leads. These are the Glengarry leads. And to you, they’re gold. And you don’t get them.
Because to give them to you is just throwing them away. (he hands the stack to Williamson) They’re for closers.
And before you go and slam me for being a Moleskine bandwagonner, I’ll cop to ordering them online must be five years ago.
Finally! Garanimals for Nerds! Chantal Mora’s project at Parson’s is the digitalwardrobe :
“… I hope to demonstrate how users might regain control of imposed technology systems by harnessing it as a tool to track the transitory narratives in our daily fashion choices.
This project consists of an RFID tracking system, a database, and an interface. As clothing is worn, the RFID system records it, the database stores it, and the interface visualizes it. The system will allow users to view the data in an environment where new relationships between wearer, object and wardrobe will exposed.”
Too Bad. Looks like the Economist and Marks and Sparks were working around the same idea - a year ago. Oh - and IDEO in 2001.
In a different project, Manuel Lima, an MFA candidate at Parson’s, is attempting to dig into how topics and memes spread through the online world with a program called BlogViz.
“Blogviz is a flash driven visualization model for mapping the
transmission and internal structure of top links across the blogosphere.
It explores the idea of meme propagation by assuming a parallel with
the spreading of most cited URLs in daily weblog entries.”
You can track some his thoughts about the project on his blog.
I’m more interested in Sangita Shah’s work on “diabeates” though.
“…I’m off to the pub, sorry, I’ve got a litter of kittens to stroke and some hoovering to be done. …”
With that, Georgina Turner closes off her commentary on the England vs. Bangladesh test this afternoon.
You know that sentence could be radically misinterpreted.
:-)
As a speechwriter, how far should you stretch to develop an amusing metaphor? The Prime Minister gave a speech to the Empire Club today, mapping out his economic vision for the country to a group of dyed-in-the-wool financial and business leaders.
Looks like Scott Feschuk is finally leaving his mark as the PM’s speechwriter:
Wile E. Coyote as a metaphor for financial mismanagement? I guess that is a contemporary reference - for people over 35.
A political comment here: aside from an ill-managed interregnum in the late 70’s, and the Conservative hold on government from 1984 to 1993, the Prime Minister’s own Liberal Party has formed the Government of Canada for most of the past century.
So who exactly does he have in mind when he says “… our fiscal recklessness over decades …” ? And which Looney Tunes characters would they be?
UPDATE! I completely overlooked the timely Star Wars reference:
” …Now some of you are probably thinking to yourselves – fine, he says no deficits, but he’s been spending too much lately. Martin’s lost it! He’s gone over to the dark side!”
Or this:
“… couple weeks ago, I was in Nova Scotia, announcing an agreement with the province on early learning and child care. I looked at the papers the next morning — Martin continues spending spree! blared the headlines. You’d think I was out there dishing out 20-dollar bills to toddlers – telling them, here, go buy yourself something that squeaks, courtesy of the government of Canada.”
It’s not often that a speech by a head of government makes you laugh - on purpose.
“If I had a nickel for every time I’ve heard her intone the phrases “We are experiencing higher-than-usual call volumes,” “Your call will be answered in priority sequence,” and the Big Lie, “Your call is important to us,” I wouldn’t be writing this book. I’d be charging admission and selling snacks at my fabulous roadside attraction, Nickel Mountain.” (Globe and Mail)
That’s a quote from Laura Penny’s The Truth Abouth Bullshit. This Halifax author has clearly joined millions of others with an extreme antipathy towards telemarketers and their ilk.
And here’s another good quote:
“It’s a bullshit pandemic,” … “And while bullshit is nothing new, all the money and modern technology that’s going into producing it these days makes it simply enormous.”(Toronto Star)
You know what I’ve noticed, though, looking for more information about Penny’s book? She’s building up a good clip book as a “go to spokesperson” on B.S.
But can she compete with the real champion? Paul Bunyan’s Babe, the big blue ox?
Here’s some Kuro5hin discussion on call centres.
I’d love to see the methodology for a recent survey of European attitudes towards the French:
For the Germans, the French are “pretentious, offhand and frivolous”. The Dutch describe them as “agitated, talkative and shallow.” The Spanish see them as “cold, distant, vain and impolite” and the Portuguese as “preaching”. In Italy they comes across as “snobs, arrogant, flesh-loving, righteous and self-obsessed” and the Greeks find them “not very with it, egocentric bons vivants”.
Interestingly, the Swedes consider them “disobedient, immoral, disorganised, neo-colonialist and dirty”.
Headline in Promo, referring to the promotional donkeys in attendance at the MCCA Awards.
Now, if only a evangelical marketing genius could work that into one of the huge promotional campaigns they always seem to have on the go.
“Come to our Sunday dancercize session! You haven’t seen this much ass shaking since the three wise men got lost!”
I know, I know. The comments function isn’t working. Teaches me to stay with an old install of MT.
If you want to reach me, it’s colin(at)canuckflack.com
Sorry about the disruption.
Go to tiny mix tapes. Read “How to Write a Tiny Mix Tapes News Story, v.1b03“.
A little taste:
III. Now, begrudgingly, give them the plain, unsalted facts (though a little attitude is okay): “Sam Prekop, in support of his Sealess, Cakeless second album, Who’s Your New Professor [TMT Review], which took most of a decade to come out, is touring both American coastlines and even the Canadian border.” Remember, never say anything the easy way.
V. Say a little something nice about the artist, even if you’re kind of blah toward them. It helps to include some obscure cultural reference, too:
“Anyway, look, the answer is he is your new professor, alright? Not like Toru Tanaka (man, Mr. Fuji was so much cooler when he managed Warlord and the Barbarian), but like a professor of soothing lounge-soul, and not just one with a Master’s, I’m talking a PhD with tenure and everything.” Juxtaposition of journalistic and conversational diction adds to hilarity.
Steven Levitt, the UofChicago economist and author of Freakonomics (the new hit pop economics sensation), blogged about an email he received from Malcolm Gladwell:
“thought you would enjoy this. a man in the security line at toronto airport today recognized me, pulled out a copy of freakonomics, and made me sign it. we are totally co-branded! cheers, m.”
Was that man:
a) an economics geek
b) a social sciences graduate
c) a cultural anthropologist
d) a crack dealing realtor and former Chicago public school teacher
e) just reading something he found in the airport bathroom
f) prone to picking up the aisle books in the Borders business section
g) following the stampeding herd of consultants to the next big thing?
Speaking of Levitt: if you’re an economics geek, you’ll LOVE this archive of his NBER papers.
Research at the University of Alberta reveals that hand gestures, when used during conversations, may be an attempt by your brain to better express your story through language, rather than a representation of meaning.
When I lived in Italy as a kid, I was enthralled by how expressive Italians become by reinforcing their conversation with hand gestures (great photo here).
As an adult, I give my clients the asinine advice that they should keep their hands still and to the side of their desk/microphone/podium. If they have to reinforce a point, they should make a gesture with a gently closed fist, the thumb crossing the bent forefinger towards the audience, not an accusatory and possibly unsettling pointed finger.
Here’s a guide to Sicilian hand gestures - many of which can result in sudden physical pain dished out by the receptor (how’s that? throwing out some communications theory for the homies!).
Or Neapolitan hand gestures (a helpful hint about the explanatory grid: it seems that “coming soon” really means “this gesture is so rude, I’m afraid my priest will read this and give me penance.”)
A pretentious little tidbit on Hidatsa Native American gestures.
How about a general pointer on how to behave in cross-cultural situations?
And, in case you’re a real geek, an academic discourse on Italian hand gestures from the sixteenth to eighteenth centuries, with plenty of academic references.
But maybe we should just leave the emphatic gestures to musicians:
Why didn’t the j-school career counsellor mention this job? Peter Shaplen is the Little Bo Beep to the media sheep outside the Jacko trial in California:
… He negotiates the so-called “asphalt fees” charged by Santa Barbara County to the assembled pack that allows them to stand in the courtroom car park (these began at the princely sum of $7,500 per day, but Shaplen haggled the county down to $1,500 a day when it became clear that fewer hacks than expected were showing up for the hearing. TV companies now pay $325 per day each and newspapers $14.)
Shaplen also choreographs the legal analysts speaking to the pool camera, lets photographers and camera crews know where Jackson is and when he is due to arrive so they can prepare their shots, co-ordinates the question of the day to lob at Jacko in the eight seconds it takes for him to walk from car to courtroom door, doles out the seven courtroom press seats available daily, helps the foreign media apply for credentials, explains which rules they have broken when they are yanked out of the courtroom by bailiffs, ensures that journalists comply with the rigid decorum orders of Judge Melville, and organises a Monday night dinner for reporters. For this, he is paid $750 a day by the US television networks.” (Guardian, r.r.)
Here’s an archived LATimes bio on Shaplen.
I admit it. I’ve been watching the Amazing Race. I’ve been particularly interested in the inadvertent product placements - the giant roadside hoarding in Argentina, the cigarette ad powerwall in an Indian corner store.
Well, Air Jamaica blew their placement last night. In every past episode, the contestants have arrived at the international airport, begging and pleading to be put on the earliest possible flight. And airline staff have been friendly and accomodating, even holding planes and reopening gates.
Yesterday, the three teams met their match at the Montego Bay Air Jamaica counter. Helmet hair, pressed suit and unsmiling face - Air Jamaica’s check-in supervisor steadfastly denied seats were available on any earlier flight.
A stark comparison to their past experiences while zipping through airports, Air Jamaica managed to come across as cold, unsympathetic and inflexible.
Not a great performance - and it was put in horrible contrast by the affable American Airlines staff in Montego Bay. They made sure the contestants were on a much earlier flight, even holding up the flight.
I just had a thought - what if they KNEW the contestants were coming through?
Am I the only one that really despises the new OnStar ad? You know it. The one where a range of children and teenagers, all suitably ensconced in their comfortable middle class lives, question their parents’ worthiness and reliability because they even doubted, for a second, about picking up the OnStar subscription at $24.95 a month.
I find the ad even more offensive because of the lilting rhythm of the “Long and Winding Road” in the background. Dammit, I wish Michael Jackson had never bought the Beatle’s library.
Sure, the service has its benefits. But the kids compare it to such safety advances as airbags and safety glass. Come on. We’re still talking about a built-in carphone with GPS. And it doesn’t even come with SMS or a video camera.
The last time I saw people rushing out to buy a consumer feature this unwieldy, Gordon Gekko was roaming the beach in front of his Hampton’s weekend house, holding a portable phone the size of a toaster to his head.
Speaking of the use of human stem cells in lab animals:
“The centaur has left the barn more than people realize.” - Stanford bioethicist Henry Greely in the WSJ last week.”
Poor Tyrone Davies. Apparently promoting an upcoming showing of his film at a local film festival, he appeared on a Missouri TV show. He looked a little pasty and unsure of himself. The hair looked a little greasy, the shoulders slightly hunched.
Still, he was holding his own until a few minutes in - when a sudden burp prompted a live revisiting of his last meal. On the interviewer’s desk.
Link via Circadian Shift and Panopticist.
This tag, which came attached to a new girls’ shirt, made me pause. Marks and Spencer makes a fine range of young children’s clothing. With most brands, I’ve become used to reading a safety warning along the lines of “please keep loose clothing away from sources of heat .” Marks and Spencer seems to be playing it cute with a generic “keep your child away from fire and flames.” Of course I will! But, is there any chance wearing your 80% viscose, 20% Banlon shirt might increase the risks faced by my children? Any chance at all?
In England, I believe, this would be called too clever by half. You cannot raise risk awareness with such wide-ranging generalizations - nor can you minimize any legal liability.
Just tell the truth: “Wearing this shirt made of charcoal briquettes increases your risk of inflammation.”
The Blackberry has a very elegant and tactile design. But one of my colleagues took a look at my little addiction and commented: “that looks worse than the paint job in a dumpy bar bathroom.”
Do you write on science topics? Maybe one of your audiences is children? The latest edition of Sciencelink, the newsletter of the Canadian Science Writers’ Association, may be for you.
Sprinting to the bathroom at a local Tex-Mex restaurant the other day, my five year-old was stopped cold in his tracks (despite a rather urgent calling) by poor design.
Faced with two doors, much like an abbreviated Let’s Make A Deal, he couldn’t decide which path to take. Cowboy or Cowgirl, the signs read. To me the choice was clear - then again, I can read. I understood the words and the context of the designer’s wry humour.
In their quest to develop themed spaces, are designers and developers overlooking utility and practicality as they pursue a vision or a unique experience? Frank Bruni examined some of the complications that are arising as increasingly self-important restaurants in NYC, ummm, “articulate their vision” in the restroom.
“At WD-50 … the doors to the restrooms are so well disguised as sections of a bamboo wall that the restaurant has been forced to post an only marginally helpful hint. “Push the wood,” says a sign nearby.
“We wanted to engage people throughout their time here,” said Wylie Dufresne, the chef and an owner of WD-50. “It’s all meant to be fun.”
Before the sign went up, Mr. Dufresne said, diners looking for the restrooms often went astray. “People were opening up the door to the liquor closet, people were opening up the door to the linen closet,” he said. Something had to give.”(NYT)
To me, the need to post an explanatory sign means the designer has failed at the simple task of moving customers around the space. The more time I spend looking for the john, the less time I have to buy another high margin drink. Even worse - the more time it takes the server to cycle my table.
A hasty note taped to a bamboo wall is the physical expression of the “L for Loser” hand signal. That note should be a scarlet letter to be featured prominently in the designer’s book alongside their expensive pre-opening photos of the restaurant.
More on wierd bathrooms.
What does it say about the design of your comprehensive web portal if you feel the need to develop a separate tutorial site to help your employees use it?
That’s the situation with the Government of Canada portal (canada.gc.ca). The single entry point for information on Government of Canada programs and services, it is touted in every advertising campaign launched by the Government.
Apparently, some employees find the portal difficult to use. The solution? Explore the Canada Site, a separate web site featuring “courses” on using the Canada portal. The ultimate goal?
“In only 10-15 minutes for each tutorial, you will learn techniques and shortcuts that may shave hours off the time you currently spend looking for government information.
Ouch.
Of course, let’s view this in context: for the fifth year in a row, Canada ranked first in Accenture’s review of e-government initiatives.
Wouldn’t be great if you some formal judicial process existed to prosecute (or even just persecute) lazy writers dependent upon tired cliches and poorly constructed analogies?
The Minor Fall, The Major Lift has taken a shot at what such an indictment would look like:
1. The defendant STRAWBERRY SAROYAN is a writer or “journalist” who was contracted to provide THE LOS ANGELES TIMES with a standard fame-limbo-resurrection profile of the screenwriter Shane Black.
2. On or about May 1, 2005, THE LOS ANGELES TIMES did knowingly publish said piece, under the execrable and obvious headline “The end of a fade for Black.” …
5. Defendant SAROYAN, in paragraph eight, violated the rule against mixing metaphors, with the following: “…Black seemed to be grasping at straws, throwing out pieces of the puzzle but unsure of how they fit together.”
The entire entry is worth a read.
Not Edward von Kloberg III, who represented the unsavory, the unwelcome and the unelected in Washington’s salons and corridors of power.
von Kloberg told South America Report in 1999:
“I’m an old-fashioned lobbyist,” [said] von Kloberg, 57. “I give a lot of dinners and lunches.”
He’s also a name-dropper, and enjoys distributing photocopies of articles that highlight his company’s activities in red ink. Praised … as “a master of diplomatic mixing and mingling,” von Kloberg has acquired a reputation for representing dictators and despots like Suriname’s Desi Bouterse, Romania’s Nicolae Ceausescu, Zaire’s Mobutu Sese Seko - even Iraq’s Saddam Hussein.
Asked if he’s ever ashamed to represent men most normal people would view as tyrants, von Kloberg retorts: “Shame is for sissies.” He adds quickly that “my job is to give my clients the best advice: the truth. If they’re a basket-case, they need to know it. I never hide the warts, but show them what they can do better.”
The WPost ran von Kloberg’s obituary today. Nothing truly outrageous - no blowdarts, car bombs or poisoned sherry - he committed suicide by jumping from a castle in Rome.
Marni Jackson has written a neat little piece for Walrus: 13 reasons for list lust.
Although I don’t agree with her backhanded generalization about Americans and lists (after all, what the hell did Martin Luther post? A list. A loooong list), some of the reasons are amusing and challenging:
7. In music, the individual iPod playlist has become a form of musical expression in itself. The new version is iPod shuffle, which takes your playlist and randomizes the sequence. This has a modern, biodynamic flair, like the endless possible recombinations of the genetic code. What is the slogan for the iPod shuffle? “Life is random.” This pretends to subvert the traditional, hierarchical list—but a list it remains!
11. The indented paragraph begins to have a dated look. Magazine editors now “package” stories, breaking up scary blocks of text with sidebars, boxes, and snappy design elements intended to make print look more like TV. I can always tell the ages of my email correspondents by whether or not they use paragraphs. Punctuation, upper case, salutations—that’s for people who don’t have a life. Imagine Virginia Woolf ending a letter to Vanessa Bell with an emoticon…Dear Vanessa, I fear one of my headaches is coming on, so I must be brief. Do tell me what you think of my recent scribblings. 
Virginia.”
And while you’re feeling all literary …. try listening to the Indigo Girls’ Virginia Woolf.
Michael Morrissey, an eighth grader in Clovis, New Mexico, prompted a school-wide lockdown after the police were called to investigate a suspicious object.
Turns out someone had reported his
“30-inch burrito filled with steak, guacamole, lettuce, salsa and jalapenos. It was wrapped inside tin foil and a white T-shirt.”
Ironically, the burrito was part of Morrissey’s extra credit assignment to develop a product and create relevant commercial advertising.
“… We had to make up a product and it could have been anything. I made up a restaurant that specialized in oddly large burritos,” Morrissey said.(WFTV)
© 2008 Colin McKay
|
Powered by 