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Reasons to fire your client

// September 30th, 2004 // No Comments » // Lists

  • Your primary contact point is in the procurement office.
  • They’ve just implemented an enterprise-wide e-commerce solution: EBay.
  • At the last trade show, they handed out branded trucker hats.
  • A 60 Minutes crew is sitting in their office – and you didn’t invite them.
  • Your client only has a hotmail account – at the Kinko’s.
  • You just can’t get over the internal motivational video – the CFO and CMO covering Whitesnake’s “Here I go again.”
  • The CEO hit on Maria Bartiromo – on air!
  • In Vegas for cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 a trade show, the CMO asks you to keep the cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 reporter busy because he wants to take a hooker upstairs and cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 do blow off her stomach.
  • The Russian security service drops by “for a chat.”
  • Whenever you use the word “media,” the aged founder starts chattering about Marshall McLuhan and acid.
  • They believe that a front page photo will steal their soul.
  • The client asks “Can you get us PR but also keep us way under the radar? Thanks.”
  • Their IR officer spends most of her time day trading.
  • “Do you mind delaying your invoice for two weeks?”
  • Their idea of targeted marketing is a t-shirt cannon.

Jon Stewart Quote of the Day

// September 30th, 2004 // No Comments » //

As quoted in the Chicago Sun-Times lowest cost Creative Suite 5 Design Premium:

    Much of the campaign is, “Put on this jean shirt, roll it up. I know it gives you hives! Just put it on! Get out there and tell the guy in the Dunkin’ Donuts you’re fightin’ for him.” And so a lot of their plea is, “I’m just like you.” And you just wanna say, “Really? You watch 10 hours of TV a day? ‘Cause it seems like you got a country to run.”

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You want a debate? I’ll show you a debate!

// September 30th, 2004 // No Comments » // community, Creativity, Favourite, Retro Adobe premiere elements 8 best buy

Such a lot of fuss about tonight’s presidential debates. 32 pages of rules. No direct questioning between the candidates. No cuban heels adobe production premium cs4. Will the cameras reveal that GWB has the better head of hair? Will Perot pop out of a cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 Jim Lehrer suit and frantically start waving multi-coloured economic charts?

What sort of debate is that? Where’s the fun? Where’s the heckling? At my college, the cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 Trinity College Literary Institute emphasized debating as a formal skill download dreamweaver mac and recreational activity. (The difference between the two? A keg.)

To win a cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 Lit debate, you had to have a head on your shoulders, the cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 ability to absorb rhetorical blows, a rapport with the audience, and cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 the ability to project your voice – far. Debates were held in formal reception rooms, auditoriums, even in the cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 quadrangle of the college. The most amusing, however, was the Subway Debate.

Two debate teams, two suitably inebriated people on each, would pile into the cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 St. George station of the cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 Toronto subway. Behind them would be a sizable entourage of 20 to cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 40 people, and they would all stream into one (already occupied) subway car.

The Speaker of the cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 Lit would call the meeting to order and announce the topic to cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 be debated. At the next stop, the debate would begin. Each debater stood up, stated their position, and cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 launched into a raucous and possibly libelous argument of their position. Each was allowed 2 to cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 3 minutes to make his/her argument – the cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 amount of time it took the subway train to travel to cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 the next stop.

Other debaters, audience members and cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 the fellow subway riders threw in comments and insults as needed, especially if the cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 debated was flailing and failing.

The whole group continue to cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 debate, heckle and mock as they traveled about 4 stops westward. At that cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 point, we would all cross over to the other side of the cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 Bloor St. subway line and continue with rebuttals as we headed back to cheap adobe premiere pro cs3 the college – and more beer and wings.

You never know where you’ll come across a Lit veteran – like this guy.