If you’ve ever wondered what the life of a rent-an-elf is like, you have to visit “Now is the winter of our Discontented Elf”, a great journal of one person’s life as a seasonal character hire. A sample entry:

The Suits came to check on Santa today.

Santa: (watching Suit approach) He’s going to ask us where all the kids are.

Suit: (approaching) Hey, Santa, where are all the kids?

Elf Winky: In jail?
Elf JoeBo: Doin’ your wife?
Elf Destructo: Selling crank in Bath and Bedding?
Elf Cranky: Or even, in school at one-thirty on a Wednesday afternoon?
Santa: (to Suit) Ho ho ho!

Thanks to Jeremy Popper for the pointer!